its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize