when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
