drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
