you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
