wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
