ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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