We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize