I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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