if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
