I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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