Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
