Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Life is so much better after having sex.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Vodka?
Forever.
They took my balls.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize