I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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