hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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