i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
