So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
how drunk are you?
Several
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
