This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
