i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
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Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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