the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
He felt like a one man threesome
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
