My hand turned me down
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
