Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
