Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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