i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
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