oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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