thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
You smell like stripper and shame
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
