You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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