Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
