My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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