I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
