Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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