Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize
