Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize
