So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
