I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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