would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize