Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
