So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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