A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize