no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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