Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize