We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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