They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
