and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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