Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
