The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Every concussion has its silver lining
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
