you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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