I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
