you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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