I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
