Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
