I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
